There is a weariness that is deeper than just being tired.  It’s sometimes called “bone weary” and it speaks of the ache that fills your body from simply too much–too much.  When I have overdone it physically, or hour-ly, then I find my muscles ache.  (Hour-ly means too many hours up and at ’em and not enough hours doing zzzzzz’s on the mattress).  But sometimes it’s a “soul weariness” that creeps up on you and you realize that the emotional, spiritual reservoir is running on empty.  You realize there isn’t much left in the tank. 

How do you know that?  Self diagnosis is arguably the best though probably your close friends could give you a hint too.  You find yourself lacking energy for conversations or situtations; you don’t have patience for things; you find yourself irritated by people; you want to withdraw rather than engage.  To me it sounds like “soul weariness”.  And when it gets really bad, it can actually become cannibalistic as you begin to eat your own soul into despair.  You begin to lose hope and the weariness of despair overcomes all sense of life. 

I know, I’ve been there. 

What do you do about it?  I wish I had a “snap your fingers” correction.  Obviously rest is a good antidote. Another one for me is to take caution that I don’t enter into significant negotiations or even heavy conversations while soul-weary.  The soul sickness puts you at a disadvantage and can really be hurtful to myself, or to the ones I engage with. 

For me it doesn’t destroy my faith.  If anything I find I retreat in prayer to God.  Because I am not a person who uses human forums to complain, God gets a fair bit of it.  I dump on Him.  I don’t blame Him but I tell Him what’s going on.  I “name names” and describe feelings.  Sometimes it’s nasty.  I don’t like me when I do it but I think I can trust Him to protect confidence when I do it. 

What do you do when you get soul – weary? 

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